They are everywhere, the haters of all things colorful and good. We have to work with them, shop with them and often live around them in our families. In this era of supercharged hate and political divide, people have become toxic in their peacocking of beliefs and tribalism. It’s harsh and often unavoidable.
There are ways to persevere, tolerate, navigate and get through these hordes with our head held high, our integrity intact, and joy on our radar.
Live and let live
Remember there are people in your life you will not change. Don’t waste your time and energy on them. Some people are as invested in who they are and what they believe in as you are and then some. Are you willing to change? Let them be themselves and if they are wrong, karma will land at some point.
Set healthy boundaries
When you can’t avoid certain people because they are in your daily life, make healthy choices in how you interact. Separate yourself from them when they become annoying, go to another space or area. Don’t engage them in conversations about topics you know will be toxic. Be respectful.
Be careful making assumptions
In these times of stressful world events, divided times we all sometimes react out of frustration, fear and stress. Even those close to us that we think we know well can do or say things that don’t land. Give people the benefit of the doubt at first if they do or say something offensive. Ask for clarification before you kick them to the ideological curb.
Avoid taking things personal
It’s not always about you. Haters hate. Ignorant is what ignorant does. People aren’t always doing things to you, they are just doing them. We are best situated in this world if we don’t allow all the messages of hate, invalidation, anger and dissent to pierce our self worth, our identity, and our love for ourselves. We are worthy of love, respect and equity no matter what sick people say or do.
Practice attraction rather than promotion
Live by example. While we might feel the need in these times to justify our existence and place at the table, we need not. Gay is good. Gay is a gift. Gay is special. We should show the world our gifts with pride and color by being good people, solid in our lives, and whole. No need to promote, convince or sell like those people knocking at doors with a book in hand have to.
Smoker of fine tires, eater of natural foods, connoisseur of aromatic leathers, pusher of limits.